Turn 11: In the Halls of Darkness
The End of Year Employee Satisfaction Awards were presented late last night. The most prestigious award, the “World Leader in a Fast Changing Environment” goes to …….. Sauron. Even though they haven’t been feeling a hundred percent recently, the employees of the great Mordor Warmachine voted unanimously for complete satisfaction in their roles.
In a ground breaking interview our reporter Drogo Proudfoot of the Shire put some searching questions to the Dark Lord in his mountain citadel.
Drogo: “Can you tell our readers what management techniques you use to so successfully motivate your personnel?”
DL: “Well, it’s just a question of knowing your creations really. My staff are motivated by simple impulses. The urge to kill and destroy being foremost. I think it important to set achievable targets and to implement a suitable reward scheme.”
Drogo: “Such as the murder of innocent civilians in Belfalas?”
DL: “Indeed.”
Drogo: “And the wholesale slaughter of 35,000 men, women and children in the City of the Corsairs?”DL: “Yes. Yes. Another good example. I think that this demonstrates that when you empower your employees, the results can be rather dramatic.”
Drogo: “Is there anyone that you owe your success to?”
DL: “I rather hope that my Master, the Great lord Melkor is watching all this. I’m sure I heard his laughter echoing across the void.”
Drogo: “Thank you for your time Great Lord.”
DL: “Not at all….. Now, I have some questions for you…”
Dreadful weather strikes the land as icy winds and thick snowstorms confine the stout Dwarves to their mountain strongholds. Freakish desert storms grip the southern lands of Umbar as swirling winds and sand prevent the pirate kings army from engaging the Mordor invaders.
The Lord Faramir was slain in a foolhardy attempt to reinforce Lamedon. Orcs streamed out of the ghost city Belfalas and fell upon the Gondorian army. 4000 knights were slain in addition to the captain of the White Tower. 5000 orc casualties were seen as an acceptable loss.
Orc armies converged on middle Elven lands taking Anduin and the Gladden Fields. 40,000 casualties were split by both opponents.
Rohan made a plucky defence of East Emnet when 2000 horsemen held off 3500 rampaging orcs for two hours, but eventually they were overcome.
Denethor marched into the Entwash almost unopposed to put pressure upon the Mordor lines. Huge orc forces are streaming into Umbar as Khand is retaken. 21k orcs were killed for 17k pirate men taken completely unawares in their camps.
Wolf riders from Isengard poured into the Brown Lands mopping up 130 Easterlings that had lost their way. Meanwhile 20,000 Riders of Rohan merged forces with the Uruk Hai of West Emnet, laying siege to the outskirts of Edoras. The “Golden Hall” of Edoras is now more akin to the “Brown Hall” as hordes of Orcs apply a new kind of pebble dash to the ancient home of Rohan.
In a ground breaking interview our reporter Drogo Proudfoot of the Shire put some searching questions to the Dark Lord in his mountain citadel.
Drogo: “Can you tell our readers what management techniques you use to so successfully motivate your personnel?”
DL: “Well, it’s just a question of knowing your creations really. My staff are motivated by simple impulses. The urge to kill and destroy being foremost. I think it important to set achievable targets and to implement a suitable reward scheme.”
Drogo: “Such as the murder of innocent civilians in Belfalas?”
DL: “Indeed.”
Drogo: “And the wholesale slaughter of 35,000 men, women and children in the City of the Corsairs?”DL: “Yes. Yes. Another good example. I think that this demonstrates that when you empower your employees, the results can be rather dramatic.”
Drogo: “Is there anyone that you owe your success to?”
DL: “I rather hope that my Master, the Great lord Melkor is watching all this. I’m sure I heard his laughter echoing across the void.”
Drogo: “Thank you for your time Great Lord.”
DL: “Not at all….. Now, I have some questions for you…”
Dreadful weather strikes the land as icy winds and thick snowstorms confine the stout Dwarves to their mountain strongholds. Freakish desert storms grip the southern lands of Umbar as swirling winds and sand prevent the pirate kings army from engaging the Mordor invaders.
The Lord Faramir was slain in a foolhardy attempt to reinforce Lamedon. Orcs streamed out of the ghost city Belfalas and fell upon the Gondorian army. 4000 knights were slain in addition to the captain of the White Tower. 5000 orc casualties were seen as an acceptable loss.
Orc armies converged on middle Elven lands taking Anduin and the Gladden Fields. 40,000 casualties were split by both opponents.
Rohan made a plucky defence of East Emnet when 2000 horsemen held off 3500 rampaging orcs for two hours, but eventually they were overcome.
Denethor marched into the Entwash almost unopposed to put pressure upon the Mordor lines. Huge orc forces are streaming into Umbar as Khand is retaken. 21k orcs were killed for 17k pirate men taken completely unawares in their camps.
Wolf riders from Isengard poured into the Brown Lands mopping up 130 Easterlings that had lost their way. Meanwhile 20,000 Riders of Rohan merged forces with the Uruk Hai of West Emnet, laying siege to the outskirts of Edoras. The “Golden Hall” of Edoras is now more akin to the “Brown Hall” as hordes of Orcs apply a new kind of pebble dash to the ancient home of Rohan.
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